September 2020: Taking Care of Each Other

9/29/2020

Michael A. Marinelli, Ed.D. '76

Dear Members of the Archmere Community,

Last Sunday’s second reading from Saint Paul’s letter to the Philippians, he writes, “Brothers and sisters: if there is any encouragement in Christ, any solace in love, any participation in the Spirit, any compassion and mercy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, with the same love, united in heart, thinking one thing. Do nothing out of selfishness or out of vainglory; rather, humbly regard others as more important than yourselves, each looking out not for his own interests, but also for those of others.”

We believe in our Catholic faith that the Word of God is living and active in the world. If ever words were relevant, living, and active, these words of Saint Paul to the people of Philippi craft for me the message I share with you as we have started a new school year. Since I began working in education in 1984, I can’t recall any other time that was more divisive and challenging on so many levels than the moment in which we are living. The economic, social, and emotional impact of the pandemic, the racial unrest, and the political climate have created many challenges for us to be “united in heart, thinking one thing.”

Because we have been forced to adapt to new ways of working and managing our day-to-day lives, we are all faced with so many more decisions than ever before. Our calendars have been changed, making long-term, and even weekly plans tentative. We have to “think through” daily actions, like going to the grocery store during off-peak hours, to determine if they are critical or necessary relative to our safety and the safety of others. I don’t know about you, but I am finding that things that took little time or thought to accomplish are now requiring much more thought and deliberation. Quite frankly, some days can be exhausting, especially if we stop to consider how many individual decisions we have had to make in one day related to our families, our work, and our friends.

So what can we do? None of these issues of our present time seem to be short-lived. How can we take care of ourselves so that we can effectively take care of others?

We received positive media coverage recently regarding our health and wellness programs slotted on Wednesdays for our students - a mid-week respite. Perhaps that is where we start - to carve out some time each day, each week, to decompress - doing what makes us content. Perhaps if we feel more of an inner sense of peace rather than anxiety, then we will have more patience to deal with change, uncertainty, and other people’s emotions that may cause them to be abrupt with us. Perhaps taking the time with ourselves to reflect and pause will give us the energy we need to “[look] out not for [our] own interests, but also for those of others.”

There is a prayer that was written by Fr. Edward Schmidt, SJ entitled, “My Mask.” It expresses the essence of what motivated me to share the words of Saint Paul with you:

MY MASK

Holy God, you see me and you hear me.

Through my mask, you see if I smile or if I scowl.

Through my mask, you hear me if I whisper a brief prayer or mutter a muffled curse.

My friends don’t see or hear or know; nor do my family; nor my colleagues.

But you do.

This mask takes away power – the power of clear communication but also the possibility to infect. But it also grants a freedom to be with.

My smiles, my thoughts, my mumbles, though – these I know, but they are a greater mystery to others now.

But not to you, Lord. You see past my mask, you hear through it, you know.

But your mask, Lord, what about your mask? Who can see through your mask? Hear through it?

I cannot.

I cannot see if you smile or if you scowl.

I cannot hear if you whisper an answer to my prayer or brush off my curse.

I cannot sense if you are pleased with me or if you are waiting for me to do much better.

Can we all take off our masks, Lord? Put them away?

When the disease that moves us to mask our faces for safety fades away, will our eyes and our ears be stronger, better able to see and to hear the smiles and the frowns, the cries and the whispers of those who fill our lives? Who make our lives worth living?

Will we see, Lord, that what we think of as your mask is really also our own, our inability to find you in the rush of our lives, our failure to see you in all the wonders you show us, our incapacity to hear your gentle voice in the tumult that surrounds us.

Can we know, Lord, that we put on many masks so we can cope, avoid, pretend, be acceptable? (What scar did the Phantom’s mask hide? “Who was that masked man?”)

Help us, Lord, to move beyond our masks. You are here for us to see and to hear. Help us. Let us take off our masks.

Be safe and stay well!

Sincerely,

Michael A. Marinelli, Ed.D. '76

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